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How to stop living paycheck to paycheck lifestyle…

67% of hiring managers say they deny candidates based on lack of eye contact

Financial stress happens for two reasons: 

1) You’re not making enough money to cover all of your bills.

2) Your debt is more than your income.

I constantly had a knot in my chest stressing over my finances and every dollar I spent. After facing a period of unemployment I was at my lowest. However, one day I woke up and I realized that I never wanted to feel that again. I decided that I was no longer going to allow my money to manage me. I took control and learned a lot along the way towards a brighter financial future.

You have to understand that we are taught to earn not how to spend or money. It is up to you to take control of yourself. Play an active role in your financial health and make the time to make the difference.I’m not saying crunch numbers all day but once or twice a week evaluate your spending and balance your account. I recommend to do this daily.

What to Do:

Living paycheck to paycheck can make you feel like you’re working for nothing. Only being able to afford the basics and necessities is a blessing. However sometimes you want to do better and you want more for yourself. Decision making can be difficult in times of stress especially when it comes time to pay the bills.

Well no more being afraid of your bank account. The stuck stops here! Here are 3 tips to stop living paycheck to paycheck!

#1 Accept your situation. 

Life will happen. Emergencies will happen. It is going to be okay. You can plan, but you can’t plan for everything. Once your at point where you’re set overtakes your income it is time to act. Accept where you are.  Forgive yourself. Move on. Take it one step at a time but keep it moving. Your past has already happened but you history does not have to keep repeated itself.

#2 Check your spending. 

I did not want to use the word budget but please take time to make one. Sit down and write down all of your bills and the amount. On another sheet of paper write down your expected income. This can help you to see how you can improve. If your bills are more than your income see if there is something you can live without. For example if your cable bill is costing you too much consider using Netflix or Hulu for a while to help you pay down more important debts.

Your priorities should be your mortgage or rent, utilities, car payment, insurance, gas and food ( these can change based on your situation) If you have child support, unpaid taxes or medical bills you would want to make those a priority as well due to the consequences of forefoing non payment!

#3 Choose between building a savings or paying off debt. 

It is your choice but you must choose. You can do both but it can be negative reincforcement. If you are constantly having to spend your savings you should pay more towards debt. Also if you are avoiding debt to build a savings you need to address your debts.

Again, life happens and we are all on different pages in our lives but money impacts us all. I hope these tips help you towards a brighter financial future.

Learn how to start your budget here:  Start your budget!

Happy Monday!

On the dream deferred…

Stressed? Anxious? Feel like giving up? This post is for you.  What is the meaning behind turmoil on the path to our dreams? The path to our dreams seems linear at a young age.  As we get older, that ideal changes as we come to realize that life happens in spite of our dreams. On the path to career elevation, entrepreneurship, our relationships, we can be subjected to constant rejection.

Leading to low self-esteem and causes some to stop pursuing their dreams altogether. So, the question is: Why do some women stop chasing their dreams when faced with adversity while others persist?

Some would argue it is a matter of strength or hustle. However, it has nothing to do either. Persisting past failure requires patience and strategy.

Research suggests that the main reason some stop pursuing their highest goals due to the ‘grass is greener’ syndrome. The grass is greener syndrome suggests that at the core of people ending their journey is based on fear or fantasy. Meaning that we either expect too much or succumb to fear: “fear of being trapped in commitment, fear of boredom, fear of loss of individuality, and fear of oppression.” A easy way to know if you could be experiencing this syndrome is to examine your patterns. Sometimes the need to succeed can become toxic and dangerous similar to any addiction.

Here are the five main patterns:

1. Constantly wanting things to get better, however never being satisfied.
2. Perfection.
3. Need to run away from difficult decisions.
4. Consistent and persistent dissatisfaction with everything.
5. The need to have everything you want. Ultimately, success alone could never be enough.

As you can see, failure isn’t always explained by life challenges or other people who might have blocked an opportunity. If you fall into one of the above categories seeking psychotherapy can help you create better habits so that you are purposefully taking actions towards your dreams. Not having the right intentions can attract the very turmoil that we feel is holding us back.

Sometimes the dream isn’t deferred. Often times we have just become our own worst enemy. Nothing to feel guilty about, however be cautious of the responsibility that comes with being highly ambitious. The stress and anxiousness you feel is correlated to your motivations for the way you are living your life. IF you find yourself consistently facing chaos in your personal life, make changes from within.

“Great ambition is the passion of a great character. Those endowed with it may perform very good or very bad acts. All depends on the principals which direct them.”
– Napoleon Bonaparte

Everything happens at the right time.

We can’t rush to success. That is why comparison is a crucial thing to avoid. We will all get there, just not at the same time. Sometimes it’s okay to quit. The important thing to remember is to avoid stopping. We are all allowed to take a break and regroup. Be mindful of your goals on a daily basis as a means of inspiration so that you can enjoy the fruits of your labor. Ambition is at the core of your character and tied to the passions that ultimately lead you to your purpose.

Carry your inspiration with you. Visit our shop online today.

Our goals getter shop is live. Help us manifest our mission of empowering female founders by purchasing from our shop. We’ve partnered with tee spring to curate a collection that inspires you to thrive. By partnering with tee spring we can ensure every order is delivered in a timely fashion during CoVID19.

Every purchase will lend a hand to a small business in need. Help us empower the community while keeping your own goals in focused. Mugs, apparel, and tools designed to empower your ambition on a mission.

Thank you in advance.

Click here to shop now.

New year, new goals! A checklist to help you get started

Today is the best day for a fresh start. Feel free to make your own checklist. What better tune than now for a goal check. This doesn’t include all the things but it can be useful if you can’t find a way to refresh this year. If you find this one helpful, feel free to screen shot and complete it. And if you’re brave tag us in it on Instagram so we can share with the squad. We are all in this together and together we will make up for all 2020 stole from us.

#mondaymotivation

How to live a balanced life while battling depression

The pressure is on for twenty somethings which is why more than 20 percent have either been diagnosed or are experiencing symptoms of depression.

Major depressive disorder affects approximately 14.8 million American adults, or about 6.7 percent of the U.S. population age 18 and older, in a given year.

Sadly a lot of people choose to ignore the symptoms out of shame, guilt, or pride. However as you can see the numbers speak for themselves. So why are misconceptions still surrounding depression?

When I changed my major from biochemistry to psychology during my sophomore year of college; my goal was to become a licensed counselor and help people who were hurting or struggling to resolve the issues in their lives. Over the course of my studies there were many days where I imagined what the people would be like that I would serve. 

I would love to say that I was a model citizen and was able to ignore the blatantly ignorant stigma’s surrounding mental health. However I found myself imagining potential clients as disheveled, broken, and withdrawn. I envisioned the conversations I would have and started preparing myself for the worst client.

Looking back I always laugh at those moments. Until I was the one sitting in the therapist chair I never knew just how wrong I was.

For years I ignored the signs because they came in waves. First came the erratic behavior and my emotions were unstable. Immediately after came the fatigue, withdrawal, and the suicide thoughts.

I never in a million years thought that I would ever say to myself, “Let’s end this.” But as I stared at depleting image in the mirror that’s all I could think about. I have made plans and even made attempts.

If you are asking, “why would she do this?” You are not alone. I was always asking myself the same thing. You see, I was robbed. Not of material value but my ability to see the light in life. shutterstock_141168931.jpg (1000×705)Depression came in like the biggest shadow I have ever seen. One minute I was in the sun, enjoying my life and then the next the shadow came. The “shadow” literally changed my life.

A lot of people think that depression is brought on by negative thinking and hating yourself. Other misconceptions are that people with depression can’t maintain normal lives and are usually hermits locked behind their bedroom door. These hermits are usually referred to as “debbie-downers.” However it was quite the opposite experience for me.

You see when I realized I was depressed it was the strangest day of my life. Prior to this day I had spent a little over a year unemployed and flat broke. By the way I spent the entire 8 months paying for the vehicle I could no longer afford. This eventually led me to moving back in with my mother after being on my own for 6 years. I was at the end of a blazing interview trail. I had gone on over 22 job interviews without a single job offer. Nonetheless I remained optimistic.

I landed my current role which was a blessing and I started working again. Everything was moving along. Until one day, I got hooked by a customer. They were so rude and nasty that it forced me to cry. And I mean ugly cry. After embarrassing myself in front of my new co-workers I realized it was no longer an option for me to seek help, I had to if I wanted to remain employed.

I got the help I needed but the time while I was getting help was so hard. My co-workers, friends, family, church members were all waiting for me to “get over it.” They would say, “snap out of it.”

They are all wrong and the world’s view of depression is completely wrong. Just because they could not see the shadow or understand my pain does not make it any less valid. 

Depression kills your will power.

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If I had one word to describe depression I would have to say, it is infuriating. Depression is a draining, hopeless, and a loveless experience. As much as I wanted to appease them I could not. Depression is not something I could just snap out of so I found a way to balance out the two. After seeking help my symptoms subsided and now I have focused and clear goals. 

If you are reading this and find yourself in the same position that I was, please rememver, that it is not your fault. You are depressed. You are going through a lot. I know and I understand your pain.

Here are the top three misconceptions about depression and how to control the symptoms in any environment:

#1 Depression is constantly equated to sadness when in fact it is an illness that requires diagnoses and treatment.

Why? Many depressed individuals say that therapy and anti- depressants don’t contribute but they do. Do not let the opinions of others be your ‘end be all’ when deciding to get help. Make the best choice for yourself. Depression causes a lot of pain and a way to overcome that is to acknowledge that you need help. You deserve help.

Treatment in a therapy environment could have a major positive impact on your life and career.  It is important that you don’t compromise your health, happiness, and income during this period. Therapy can help assist you in maintaining a balanced life while battling the symptoms.

#2 The person you are talking too is not in touch with their feelings and would prefer you to be happy to make them comfortable.

You will have days where you feel like telling everyone how miserable you are. Some will show you concern and others will show you no empathy, And that’s when you find a new friend and confide in someone who can empathize with you because depression impacts your thoughts. Take caution with cutting people off though. 

Remember, depression will cloud your judgment. 

Don’t snap or go off on people. Let them be who they are and you be who you are. Don’t suffer silently but be prepared for the fact that this will make some people uncomfortable due to the unfortunate misconceptions in our society. Just choose a select few who can handle being a shoulder to you.

#3 The world is constantly moving at a fast pace and depression is not a problem you can solve fast.

People are used to fast everything these days which makes it hard for them to understand that it can take months even years to sort out your depression triggers and how to handle them.

Here is my response to that: Take your fucking time. You need to heal and rushing your recovery won’t resolve it. 

Now, there are two exceptions to this:

Exception #1:If you are in a work situation. Do your absolute best to maintain a optimistic and happy “face” in the office no matter how much it hurts. I know it sucks but you need your income and benefits, do not put you. Click here for tips on how to battle depression at work.

Exception #2: You are dragging your feet. As much as I hate to say that to you, depression will require active participation. It is something you will have to actively work through.


Afterthoughts:

Battling depression is not easy and you will be misunderstood but I want you to know you still have a choice. You can fight this and come out stronger and better than ever. despite other peoples perception of a depression diagnoses.

If you know someone else who is suffering share this ‘mojo’ Monday post with them and encourage them to seek proper treatment.

Sound off in the comments: What topics would you like to hear more about? 

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Related blog posts:

5 Tips to help you relieve depression symptoms…

Depression can’t win…


Additional Resources:

Visit helpguide.org

National suicide hotline: 1 (800) 273-8255

Images via shuttershock.

Lofty goals and big dreams? Here’s why your mindset is the key

Welcome to another #WellnessWednesday where we share easy and simple tips to hack your self-doubt and continue pressing towards your goals despite life’s resistance to them. 

 

We hope this post finds you well in the middle of another week in the year 2020. This year forced us all to rise to the occasion of the present and face the challenges that block the future. 

Don’t get me wrong there are bigger concerns we all have to be focused on, but the decimating restaurant industry and continued lay offs as Covid-19 continues to spread within the U.S. has many searching for other streams of income to keep their family or their self financially protected in uncertain times. 

Well, the good news, its not hard or too late to get started on your goals.  The bad news, your going to have to do it alone.  That’s right.  And in order to be in your best ‘fighting’ shape for this next journey of entrepreneurship or searching for your real calling, your going to need a tough mindset. 

Mental resilience is key to success.  Yes, this year has brought awareness to a lot of key factors that the role systemic racism has had on the opportunities and capital for POC business owners and POC professionals deserving of a living wage who are not paid within the range of their counterparts.  But, something we can all do for ourselves that is free right now, is focus on the muscle that’s going to give us the longevity to succeed despite color or creed: MINDSET. 

Don’t laugh or leave this page. I’m serious. As author of Killosophy, Criss Jami says, “It is easier for one to take risks and to chase his dreams with a mindset that he has nothing to lose. In this lies the immense passion, the great advantage of avoiding a materialistic, pleasure-filled way of life.”
― Criss Jami, Killosophy

In order to make our dreams a reality, we must visualize them and then believe that they will become inevitable. It sounds like magic, but it really is intentional living.

How can we get to where we want to go if we don’t know what we want? When we find ourselves unable to answer big life questions that mean we are in a transitional period and we must trust the timing of our lives. Success and happiness don’t always go together but when they do that means you are a part of the lucky ones.

Pursue your dreams with resiliency, but choose to gain happiness from the little things. In order to start visualizing what we really want we have to accept the here and now.

Repeat this success statement daily while you visualize what you want. Be direct. If you feel vague it’s okay to take the time to really decide what would make you feel like your best self.

Every day choose to commit yourself to your vision and say ‘no’ to anything that jeopardizes your long term growth. There is no such thing as an overnight success or easy life. Remember that the dream is the focus but life will continue.

Be flexible to meet life’s challenges. Access to money helps when it comes to success.  However, be mindful that money will only amplify who you already are. So, while your in the valley awaiting your next peak do your best to remember that your mindset is just as powerful.

A plan is a guide, not a guarantee. Get your mindset prepped for success by repeating this every day in the mirror:

I will remain focused on my goals.  Even if I have a moment of difficulty, I will not give up.  I know success comes with consistency.  I know that I will make it.  Things will get better.  No problem or challenge will stop me.  Everything I deserve is coming MY WAY.

Repeat daily for optimal effect.

Share this post with an ambitious friend or colleague who may have gotten off track and lost in imposter syndrome. Mirror mantras are serious confidence boosters and gateways to true self-lovery.  The kind where you don’t need others’ validation to exist. 

Now go on, get to manifesting your best. Add this to your sticky notes, note pad, or letter board so that you have the visual reminder you need to continue to dream. 


Let’s continue the conversation in the comments. Do you think visualizing success plus taking action will help you get to where you want to go or is it all smoke and mirrors? Speaking of mirrors, tell us your mirror mantra below!

Quotes for your #FridayFeeling

Dream no small dreams for they have no power to move the hearts of men.

– Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

You see things; and you say, ‘Why?’ But I dream things that never were; and I say, ‘Why not?’

– George Bernard Shaw

If you’re always trying to be normal, you will never know how amazing you can be.

– Maya Angelou

The only way to discover the limits of the possible is to venture a little way past them into the impossible.

– Arthur C. Clarke

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.

– Mark Twain

Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world.

– Harriett Tubman

A dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight, and his punishment is that he sees the dawn before the rest of the world.

– Oscar Wilde

To the one feeling trapped by unavoidable suffering

I was prepared for life to not be perfect but I never prepared for this…

Growing up in poverty, I was taught to focus on what you need and be grateful that you had anything. I was aware of the hard work and sacrifices my parents had to make to keep us clothed and fed. Initially, I handled bullying from kids who came from higher-income homes very well. My parents taught me that everybody has different blessings in life, and you can’t be jealous of what other people have.

They also taught me the value of a dollar and that happiness will only ever come from the inside. Additionally, it prepared me to understand that even if I could afford nice things, they wouldn’t bring me the things my soul needs, so you had to balance.

OK, check on all three.

Life isn’t fair, some people are more prosperous, and happiness is intrinsic. With this arsenal, I could combat anything. The majority of people are highly driven by material wealth, and I found it humbling that while I aspired to more, not having a house or diamonds wouldn’t make or break my spirit.

I always had a sense of happiness, knowing that sometimes in life, you don’t get everything you need. I didn’t realize that sometimes life gives you things you didn’t ask for and thrust you into chaos for lessons you didn’t even know you needed to learn.

I knew struggle from my humble childhood but hadn’t yet been introduced to another level of pain, emotional. I had no idea that life could drag a person down so low to force them to question their very existence. Like so many others who thought life would only give us what we could handle and that we could turn any negative situation into a favorable position. 

I knew that poor choices could often lead to gritty outcomes. I just was new to the concept that even if you are making the right choices, loving the people around you, handling your responsibilities, and being a leader in your church and community ( basically a “good person” by definition) that trouble will find you anyway.

There is ‘natural’ grief in losing a loved one because everyone understands that pain due to it being a shared experience. No one escapes death. But, our life choices and experiences, while relatable in theory, are not the same.

 Pain is subjective, and it cannot be ‘seen’ by anyone other than the person experiencing it. -Thrive2Inspire

I lost everything. Not overnight. Slowly. Like a virus. Killing every good part of me until there was nothing left, and I had to decide the kind of person I would be to a world that has shown me nothing but pain.

I am currently writing a book on exactly what happened. Still, for now, I share this point because I don’t want anyone out there to be filled with questions they can never answer—and perplexed by situations and people they will never understand. Life is an enigma in that way.

Life is not a machine. It can not be managed. There is no code that we can enter to get the life we want. Life must be lived, digested, and withstood. Life doesn’t require you to be happy, nor does it require you to have everything single thing you think you need to make it.

Life is here to make a more significant point than our vain endeavors. We are raised with hope, ambition, and the idea that we somehow can control the outcomes if we do the right things, be good people, harm no one, keep your head down, and your goals humble. But, the reality is life doesn’t discriminate.

Life doesn’t care if your good works are comparable to Mona Lisa. Life doesn’t care if you are a war hero saving hundreds. Life happens to teach the soul. I know I was shocked to find out that being the right person isn’t enough to have a ‘good life.’

Now don’t get me wrong. I have a vast imagination. Something life’s darkest moments never took away from me. I believe in hope. I believe in dreams. I also believe in fate. Sometimes who we want to be is not assigned to our soul. We inadvertently call ‘purpose.’ Your purpose (the reason you were born) may not be tied to your passions (the things that make you who you are).

Perhaps that real intention of life is the ability to find peace in times of chaos, similar to the mess we find ourselves facing now. The actual test of the human spirit will never be known under the pretense of happiness. Pain and suffering are necessary to build our’ faith,’ ‘love,’ and ‘strength’ muscles. Without pain and suffering, how would we know what we are truly capable of handling?

So if you face unavoidable suffering, I challenge you to turn away from the chaos and look inward to see the messages being brought forth to carry you into your purposeful future. Here’s a quote that sums this up perfectly from Life Hack writer and life enthusiast Anna Chui:

“You only know happiness when you have known pain. While the idea of constant happiness sounds nice, there is little chance it would be. Without comparison to happiness, there’s no reason to be grateful for it. That is to say, without ever knowing sadness or pain, you would have no reason to be grateful for happiness.”

One day the dust will settle, and you will find that while you may lose material things and people who lack the level of empathy necessary to be by your side during the darkness, you will find your light as long as you always remember that your emotions are in your control. You may feel pain but allow it to pass as merely as a single breath.

Life has no value to the tethered soul, but the free spirit, the dreamer, the creative, you inherently desire it. May this post bring you the importance of understanding that God indeed laughs when we tell him our plans. Stay in high spirits, hopeful, and healthy. Never forget that the messy moments in life create the best memories and make way for gratitude.

Moving forward

If you find yourself in an untimely or unwanted circumstance as much as your human body is telling you to feel what you’re going through, try to live through it with consistent daily actions representing that fulfillment you seek.

Take life in stride, and I promise you, everything will work out in the end. Figuratively speaking, “Nothing that is meant for you will pass you by.”

Questions or comments? Please put them down below. I read every one. I want to know if you have experienced unavoidable suffering or if there is an aspect of your life you were taking for granted before Co-Vid; how has that changed? Let’s spark a conversation and inspire someone on the path to their dreams.

The best social media platform for brand awareness

The algorithm is committed to showing users accounts they search for and interact with the most. It’s not your bio or your logo, it’s your content and instagrams algorithm that determines which posts users should see most. This means that the goal is to keep you and other users on their (Instagram, Snapchat, YouTube) platform to boost revenue, engagement.

The algorithm is not a negative thing. However it is not impossible to build a buzz around your brand, even with the influx of celebrity entrepreneurs and You-tubers. In my search for a solution that I know we all have found ourselves perplexed on, here’s what I found:

Social media is about keeping people on THEIR apps, not sending them to YOUR website or brand. This is why your posts are not being seen or are being restricted, amongst other reasons.

I value saving time and found that social media will consume your life force. Also, I didn’t want to become an entrepreneur to promote someone else’s brand but essentially that is what social media is all about. If this has been obvious to you from the beginning, kudos. But for those of us just becoming aware, this is a major lightbulb moment.

Still, want to promote on IG?

I would also like to add for those who still want to give Instagram a real go, Instagram has introduced a concept of ‘badges.’ If you have the follower count and are set up as a business page, you can now add badges. Adding the badges allows supporters to easily send donations to keep your great content coming for them. But don’t let me forget to mention that Instagram will keep 100 percent of your revenue from the badges.

Initially, social media seemed like a great place to find like minds. However, a change in the algorithm has proven less about finding like minds and generating revenue for other social media platforms. I feel duped in the sense that I thought that it was a suitable place. Instagram and Facebook will promote posts with a higher revenue potential (mostly celebrity and influencer accounts) and will be shared. 

If you are not making money for Facebook or Instagram, your posts will not be shared, even with your audience. 

Now you can take the ‘extra’ route and do it all to get followers, but I Am not a performance monkey. And refuse to participate in internet shenanigans for the like hood of going viral. I love money, but I love integrity even more. Integrity is something I refuse to sacrifice.

Life is always busy taking something away from your life, and integrity is not something I want to throw under the bus. Even it means letting go of a dream. The best way to move forward is to focus on finding a drive outside of creating an online business.

It sounds like I’m complaining, but I want to help new business owners save time and help anybody who finds themselves in the same predicament.

Social media is not great for brand awareness, but it is for personal brands. IF you want to go the influencer route, then social media is perfect for you. However, if you are building a brand, social media could waste your time and get you distracted from your company’s vision because the algorithm requires you to stay on-trend. The algorithm will show you what will keep you on the app longer, so it is less likely that the algorithm will promote your new brand’s posts.

Set up your website. The followers on social media platforms belong to those platforms. Your email list is where you can build real connections and relationships with customers for a lifetime. Also, give yourself time to see if your current Instagram strategies are working. I gave my strategies ample time to be sure that they weren’t effective before I moved on to what was best for my business.

This post is specifically pertaining to those that don’t have an audience yet that were using Instagram for brand awareness. There are other platforms like, YouTube and LinkedIn that are better to be ‘found’ than Instagram where users are encouraged to interact with accounts they already follow.

Ultimately you want to be on the social network that has your ideal customer.

But, don’t just take my word for it. Do the work and I promise you, you will want to put more time into building a platform that sends traffic to your Instagram versus the other way around.

“I’m speaking.”+

Politics have taken over 2020 (as it should). Being there is so much at stake my eyes have been glued to the debates. Kamala and our current VP’s showdown was one I was not going to miss.

Kamala Harris is representing so many and so much. Her commitment to showing the best of women’s leadership skills is inspiring. Although there have been prior female candidates who have risen to the top and landed the vice presidential bid, Kamala is the third. We have never had female leadership at this level. It was no surprise that she commanded the stage and spoke eloquently with the challenge by our current VP. And I was also not surprised by his many interruptions.

“I’m speaking,” is the new ‘reclaiming my time.’

Photo by Adrianna Calvo on Pexels.com

The debate was to discuss our differences, but women worldwide recognized the feeling when Kamala spoke those words. We have all been minimized in male-dominated settings. We have all been interrupted by the patriarchy. 

Women were not always allowed to voice their opinions and were recently highlighted in the riveting documentary series Hillary on Hulu. It was revealed that Bill Clinton lost his governor race for his second term because the citizens didn’t find Hillary to be First Lady’ material’. Hillary had to change her image to protect her husband’s career. Hillary had other women in law and politics had to make many sacrifices to see a world where we could have a female vice-presidential candidate.

Scandals aside, I was ecstatic to see her become the first Presidential nominee based on her work. She did so happily, but the point is that a woman in any leadership forum is not always welcomed, so I find that journey admiring.

Politics aside, we are witnessing women’s history right before our eyes. As we get closer to the election, I hope that we will all choose to vote and prove that democracy is thriving in America. And despite all of our differences, we can come together as one nation under God. Your choice shouldn’t be a consequence but celebrated because that’s what makes the U.S. strong.

Remember, you are amazing. I hope you had a chance to watch the debate and if you’re reading from an international location, let me know where in the comments.

Failure is delay, not defeat

Success takes time, and for these and other reasons, many people give up on their dreams at the slightest resistance. Maybe things didn’t go right the first time around or the way you planned. The truth is the beginning stages are always the hardest. When you’re having a tough time in life, it can be hard to see the good in any situation. 

You start to believe that nothing can change, and you begin to feel ‘stuck.’ Maybe things didn’t work out the way you expected. Perhaps the right opportunities never came along. Failure leads to multiple learning opportunities that help us become who we are.

Feeling ‘stuck’ comes from a place of fear and limits. When you say, “yes,” to your limits, you are saying “no” to your possibilities. Choose to be empowered by failure instead of weakened by it. It is better to endure hardships live a life you desire than to live a forced life.

Failure appears to have more of an impact on our lives based on what we believe. 

By actual definition, failure is the result of the expectations we have over our lives not being met or a person or obstacle preventing us from making progress. According to Reut Schwartz-Hebron, founder of the Key Change Institute — an organization that focuses on workplace behavior, it is first necessary “to rewire your brain” by creating new experiences and engaging 

two different cerebral systems; the explicit and the implicit memory.

After all, you have to have a self-awareness of what you’ve done wrong to get it right the next time. Obstacles and challenges build strengths and identify weaknesses to make you better. If you are letting your past mistakes hinder you from making a positive change, I encourage you to try a new perspective. 

Don’t be afraid of failure. There is no way to get a perfect score on life because no one else will experience your life from your lens. Realistically there is no ‘right’ way of doing things because you are on a unique path. Success occurs when you defeat the self-doubt and change the limiting beliefs that keep you ‘stuck’ on your failures.

Open your mind and accept that life will not always be fair or convenient. There are no guarantees for ‘success,’ as it means something different for everyone. 

No matter what point you are at in your life, you can earn success. Try to look at the bigger picture. What you are going through or have gone through is minuscule compared to the rest of your life. It is your job to decide the number of impact mistakes has on you. Bad things will happen to you. 

There will be missed opportunities, failed relationships, and financial troubles along the way, along with many other issues that could arise. You will not always have the ability to control your outside circumstances, but you can forever control how you handle them.

 Once your perspective changes, so will the world around you. It is up to you to choose to radiate from within the life you truly wish to experience. It would be best if you got started by taking action towards changing your mindset. A positive outlook will increase your confidence to take action necessary to break free of the glass ceiling. I use positive affirmations to reset my mind to remain focused on taking action towards my goals while overlooking the hardships.

Believing is the fuel, and self-confidence is the match that can light the fire that failure and setbacks have burnt out. Just as you have faced obstacles to get where you are now, you will continue to meet them. Take daily action towards overcoming the self-doubt and stepping into your authentic self. Create the change you wish to see. There will still be difficulties, but with time comes grace, and with it, patience brings blessings. Stay focused on your possibilities because, in the end, it will be worth it. Failure is a delay, not defeat.

The moment to chase your dreams is NOW. The question remains, ‘What are you waiting for?’ 

Here’s a simple seven-day challenge to get you started:

A great way to break the bad habits of over-analyzing your life is to keep a gratitude journal. Each day, for seven days, write down one to three things that represent gratitude. Acknowledging your gratefulness helps extend the magnitude of your willingness to accept the abundance you are due.

Let’s continue this conversation in the comments:

What have you learned from your failures that have helped you in another area of your life?

Thank you so much for reading. If you found this uplifting, share this with someone who needs this message.

Why habits are the invisible architecture of success

If you feel like you’re constantly ‘putting out fires’ in your daily life and unable to meet expectations todays post is for you. I used to wonder how some people get ahead of others and it simply boils down to habits.

Habits are behaviors we perform on a daily or otherwise regular basis. They’re not just any behaviors, though. A behavior is a habit if some component of it is at least somewhat “automatic.” Some studies estimate that habits make up 40% of our everyday behavior. With a habit, there’s some cue that triggers a behavior.

Habits are not routines but more like coping mechanisms that we have put in place to subconsciously produce a dopamine like appeal in our day. We’re not about judging habits. However, if you have specific goals in mind that you have put effort into but are not producing  results, it is recommended that your habits be the first place to look for signs of trouble.

What are you doing to achieve your goals? If there is something that you have been putting off because you don’t have to the time evaluate your daily habits and see where you could utilize your time better throughout the day. 

Sounds cliche but actions do speak louder than words. For instance, we can pronounce we are starting a business but if we are running a business that made no profits it becomes a hobby.

Success is found in your morning routine. We are what we do not who we say we are. Our habits determine the trajectory of our lives.

 

Habits to help you prosper:

•Wake up two hours before work.

•Eat breakfast.

•Plan your lunches the night before. •Schedule the things you love, like your favorite tv show or Soul Cycle session. Or schedule things you need to do,  if you’re a busy parent or side hustler.

•Develop a personal care routine.

•Stay organized.

 

What habits do you use to keep you focused on the path to your dreams?